This picture was the night that Mandi got here. Noah loved kissing my belly.
Dinner the night I went into labor.
The boys watching TV before we went to bed that night.
3:30 am As usual, I woke up and had to go to the bathroom. A strong contraction hit as I was getting back into bed. I didn't think much of it until another happened about 10 minutes later. I called Paula, our primary midwife b/c she lived an hour away and told her that this felt like labor. She asked whether she had time to make coffee and I said "sure". The contractions were stong and I couldn't talk through them w/o tensing, but they were entirely bearable at this point.
My friend Patty had 4 kids and told me that she spent most of her labors in denial, so her labor would seem that much faster. Seemed like a good idea to me. I figured I could get back into bed and "deny" that I was in labor for at least a couple of hours or until the morning.
3:57 am Oooopps, there was another contraction and I felt like I had to go to the bathroom. When I did, I noticed that bloody show was present and the contractions were now 5 minutes apart. I called Paula back and she said maybe she should pick up coffee on the way. She also took care of calling Claudette, our other midwife who lived in Petaluma, a half hour away.
Michael was still in bed and I told him that I thought I was in labor. I don't think he was 100% sure of my certainty and didn't get up too quickly. He went off to take a shower in Noah's bath. I started to strip the bed and put down the waterproof layers below the fresh not-so-new sheets.
Another friend who had delivered naturally, told me she did this little dance to keep moving during the contractions. I'm not much of a dancer so I paced back and forth in the hall between our master bath and bed room and raised my arms above my head and sort of swayed back and forth to stay loose and moving during the contractions. I'd sit on my vanity chair in between. Michael was back at this point and I asked him to fill up the tub. He said "are you sure?". I just sort of nodded and went off to sit in Chloe's nursery. I had spent a month re-upholstering Noah's rocking chair and ottoman to make it pink for a girl, and realize now that that was probably not the place that I should have chosen to sit during labor. But at the time, I was having trouble staying upright during the contractions and not tensing up. So I thought that it might help to rock. I had read as many birth stories as I could get my hands on to see how people dealt with labor and the 2 primary themes that kept repeating , were to keep from tensing up and to keep a positive outlook. So I would rock during the contractions to keep my thighs and hips loose and would visualize the strength of the contraction as the impetus to push the baby down and into position. I keep thinking to myself that the pain I was feeling was
useful and necessary, not destructive. In between, I'd relax completely and let my head roll back and stop rocking until the next. I honestly felt like I did this for several hours. Claudette arrived and checked on me. She actually kept me company and laid on the floor since there was no where else to sit in the room. She spoke in hushed tones and didn't turn on the lights or even need to examine me, which was nice.
She left to help set up and I kept up my rocking/relaxing pattern for what seem like a good while longer. At some point I wondered why Michael wasn't getting me into the tub. But, I was in sort of a zone and just focused on staying relaxed, everything else was irrelevant. Paula came in to say that she arrived.
Michael did come in and tell me that the tub was ready. I went back into our bedroom and Paula asked if she could check my progress before I got in. At this point I was guessing that I was maybe 5 or 6 cm along. I still wasn't at the point that I started at with Noah, where the contractions were 3 minutes or less apart and right on top of each other. I had more of the text book contractions of a minute to a 1-1/2 long, with a break of that much in between. So I was pretty surprised and even laughed when she said that I was at 9cm before I even got into the tub. I noticed that she had all of her equipment laid out in case it was needed.
That brief elation disappeared b/c all of the movement brought on some fast painful contractions and I was trying to figure out a new relaxation system in the tub. At first, I thought that I'd want to go back to my chair, but Paula and Claudette encouraged me to stay in the tub through a few more contractions. The tub was only about 1/2 full and there was new warm water coming in and that did feel good between contractions, so I took their advice. I figured out that if I sat with my arms around the sides of the tub and pushed off with the tips of my toes on the other side I could mimic the rocking pattern I felt comfortable with. It was nice to be able to ask that the lights be turned down and have Michael dim them. I felt less self-conscious in the dark and I could zone out into my little tub cocoon. I got back into the rythm and while the contractions were deeply painful, the minute or so break allowed me to relax and talk myself back into the mantra that the pain is
useful, not destructive. I had read that keeping your mouth relaxed and releasing any tension in your jaw is also extremely helpful and so I would concentrate on that and my rocking through the contractions. Then my water broke and while it felt like a huge gush that should have created a whirlpool vortex around me, I don't even think it caused a ripple. But it ripped through me and I could see vernix floating in the tub. I told Paula and Claudette, and they were as quietly encouraging as always..."that's great!". From time to time Claudette or Paula would use the fetal monitor and check the baby's heart rate. After this point, they seemed to check it more and more. Not too many contractions later, I felt the urge to push. They said, "go ahead". They didn't check me or anything. So I pushed. Paula applied some arnica oil to help the baby "slip out" when it pushed through the birth canal.
Mandi came in at some point and took this picture. She said I smiled and said "hi". I remember seeing her, but no one else. I guess that mom brought Noah up at some point b/c he thinks that I had the baby by "sleeping in the tub". So I guess he came in while I had my eyes closed. Other than that it was just Michael and I and Paula and Claudette.
Michael was very calm and encouraging and took care of getting anything that I needed. I found out later that he had the tub almost completely full with warm water when Claudette pointed out that he had forgotten the plastic to make it sanitary, so he was sweating as he lugged bucket after bucket of water to dump down our regular tub's drain. Just a hint in case you are considering a water birth, he didn't get it all out and having a cushion of warm water under you was actually an accidental perk. That also explained why the water was only lukewarm when I got in. Filling it twice had emptied the water heater.
I tried pushing in different positions and could eventually feel the baby's head. Paula noticed that since my pelvic bridge was flat (picture a flat bridge, vs an arched one) it might be easier to have the baby out of the tub. So I was kind of shell shocked as I laid on my back in bed with Paula on one side holding a leg and Michael on the other. Claudette gave me oxygen because the baby's heartbeat slowed while it was in the birth canal. Seemed ironic to be in that position, since all of my reading said that it was the least productive method to push a baby out. But it sure worked! I had pushed for over an hour to get Noah out. Michael and Paula pushed on my legs (my ankles were actually at my ears!) to open the birth canal and sure enough in just 2 more pushes the head was out. I pushed for maybe 15-20 minutes. Like Noah, the cord was around the neck, but nothing seemed out of the ordinary for either Paula or Claudette. In the hospital it seemed like everything was a big emergency, but they both really kept the atmosphere calm and made all of the intricacies seem like natural occurrences.
7:09am On the next push she was out, and up on my belly squirming around. She was so pink and warm and very gooey! She was so squirmy she was almost crawling. I held her and Michael stayed with me and Claudette called my mom and sister in. They got to see her almost immediately, as did Noah.
Her skin was soooo rosy. Her face was a little black and blue from her journey through the birth canal.
I remember how shocked and worried I was when Noah was born with bloodshot eyes and his cone head. I didn't realize how common these (well earned) battle scars are and how quickly they fade as the baby's amazing little body rejuvenates itself. Michael cut the umbilical cord when it was turning white and had provided Chloe with all it could. He said that it was strong and tough to cut, he was impressed with how much pressure was needed to cut through it.
I had suspected she was going to be big b/c my stomach just got enormous the last month. But I was still surprised when Claudette said that she was 20" and 10lbs 6 oz. I'm really glad that I had her at home b/c I feel that without being comfortable enought to do the things that I neededto relax (like pacing, swaying, rocking, dimming the lights, etc) and having Paula and Claudette's knowledge to get me into that crazy position, I never would have been able to push her out. I'm certain that her size would've increased her odds of being born via c-section. I'm really grateful to the midwives for giving me the opportunity to have her safely at home and to sleep together in our own bed that night.
I laid in bed, as everything was cleaned up, holding her. I had forgotten how painful the afterbirth was. I felt like the contractions were every bit as strong as the birth contractions. Paula helped to deliver the placenta which we put in a bag to plant in our yard. (Just kidding! I'm afraid to think what Huxley would've done to it.) Like Noah's birth, I had lost a lot of blood, so Paula gave me a shot of Pitocin to help. I had a little tear, but not enough to need stitches. I was amazed at what a difference that makes.
After taking care of us, Paula left to be with another mom that had called while I was in the tub. She was off to another delivery. Claudette stayed with us for a while and had her picture taken with us before she left.
Paula came back the next day to check on us. I am so grateful to both of them. I can't think of a better way to bring a baby into the world - without a stork being involved!
The after birth contractions remained strong and increased in intensity each time I nursed Chloe. I was taking cramp bark pellets and used the medical perineal ice packs. I found out latter that I was only taking a fraction of the cramp bark that I needed for them to have any effect. My stomach was total jelly and I had no abdominal muscles. So getting out of our very high bed was a challenge. But Paula wasn't about to let me do anything anyway. She insisted that I stay in bed and not do anything other than nurse, eat and sleep. I wasn't even allowed to go downstairs for the first 5 days. Michael took this very seriously. I really liked having him stay close to us. Ironically, he said that he thinks the day or 2 after having a baby are the most relaxing, b/c no one really expects anything from you. And he's right. Mandi and my mom made it so nice for us. They made us delicious meals, cleaned, entertained Noah and brought flowers up to the room. I really couldn't have asked for more!
Chloe Grace
April 17, 2008
7:09 am
20 inches
10lbs 6 oz
Please feel free to read more about Paula and Claudette at The Midwives online. www.themidwivesonline.com
